If your living room workouts are getting a bit flat, or you are finding it difficult to meet your workout goals, we are here to tell you about an exciting new fitness program that will get you out of whatever rut you are in, and have you not only looking greater than ever before in your life, but also running for the sweet love of it.
The Running With Arnold Workout Program, designed by legendary fitness guru Arnold Shwartsinager, promises to keep you on your toes night and day.
‘What the body requires for true fitness is surprise more than anything,’ RWA spokesperson Lesley Conchita-Conchita told reporters from a treadmill without breaking a sweat, ‘and that is why Running With Arnold works on a randomized schedule. You never know when the deathbots are going to pop up and try to nail you to the wall.’
If it sounds scary, it is supposed to be.
‘You will never achieve the kinds of results you want without real terror,’ shrugged Ms. Conchita-Conchita, ducking a flying buzzsaw and sending a cyborg manhunter hurtling through a plate glass window to its demise thirty floors below with one kick.
RWA has a variety of promotional packages available, and live (but close-call) support for those who want to customize their Running Man experience.