Month: September 2021

Read More

NEW FITNESS PROGRAM PUSHUPS WITH DAISY® BLAMED FOR RASH OF PEORIA-AREA HEART ATTACKS

The latest fashion fad to sweep the Midwest, the popular crossfit-esque Pushups With Daisy┬« workout program, may indeed make a clean sweep of Peoria, body and soul, according to local minister Rasbald Jenkins. ‘Pushups With […]

Read More

THESE INNOCENT CITIZENS HAD THEIR CARS TAKEN FROM THEM AND IT COULD HAPPEN TO ANY OF US

The Gorko hereby submits photographic evidence of a tragic and heartbreaking development in downtown Peoria today: hundreds of law-abiding citizens, dressed only in Spandex, have apparently had their cars confiscated by the government or a […]