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Every week our Theme Expert, Teddy, goes into detail on a new theme. This week’s theme is Crouched Behind Bushes With A Garden Hose.

It is well-known that many dads, succumbing to their artistic natures, tend to take the catch phrase ‘Trick or treat’ a little bit too literally, and assume that it is socially acceptable to offer neighborhood trick-or-treaters, invariably children, a trick rather than a treat on the iconic All Hallows Eve. That is, they dress up and scare the living bejeesus out of groups of children, sometimes even Crouching Behind Bushes With A Garden Hose with intent to soak.

WHY THE BUSHES

Let’s humor dad for once. If you are going to conceal yourself with intent to badly frighten groups of children, Crouching With A Garden Hose, one of the best places to hide your considerable rolls of spare tire is behind the shrubbery to the right of the porch steps. Very few children will even know what hit them until it is too late, and you are blasting them in their little faces with extremely cold water.

RIGHT TOOL FOR THE RIGHT JOB

If this is really how you plan to spend your Halloween, best do it right: Crouch Behind Bushes With A Garden Hose and take advantage of the true drenching power of your Jassick Super Blaster 3000 high-pressure water nozzle and show Don Markenbaldi down at 451 Maple Street, where he is crouched behind a tree with his stupid bucket, how to soak a bunch of kids.

CHARLIE SHEEN CROUCHES BEHIND BUSHES ON A REGULAR BASIS

Charlie Sheen often Crouches Behind Bushes With A Garden Hose outside his Malibu penthouse to hide from Gorko reporters. If Charlie routinely crouches before spraying reporters with his garden hose, we should probably all be caught Crouched Behind Bushes With A Garden Hose this Halloween.

Join Teddy every week as he goes stalking the internet in search of new Themes.

Photo by Delia Giandeini on Unsplash