So things have really gone south and you have decided it is time to go on the lam for awhile until things cool down. Make sure you don’t make the amateur blunder of overpacking. Even a few milligrams of extra weight could be your undoing as you are scrambling out of a window or splashing up a creek. Here is The Gorko‘s definitive 5-item overnight bag. Not an item more or less for the perfect getaway!
1. Tide To Go pen
Chances are your getaway will not be perfect, and you will end up with coffee, grass, or even bloodstains on your favorite pair of skivvies. No need to fear that nosy highway patrol, one swipe with your Tide To Go pen will erase all suspicion!
2. Neck wallet (or fanny pack)
When I first went on the lam in 2014 I didn’t even know that neck wallets existed, but they are the perfect accessory for keeping all of your forged documents, bundles of cash, and photographs of the people who turned you in whom you’ll be stalking and hopefully getting your revenge on.
3. A skateboard
Hey, don’t make your getaway cross-country on foot! That’s a surefire way to end up back in the slammer. Get yourself a 12 or 15-inch skateboard, Hudson Hawk. It fits in your purse.
4. Baby wipes
Not for real babies, dummy, for your hands. Quickly clean and sanitize face, hands, and other surfaces that get sprayed with human or animal plasma.
5. Granola bars
You may not have time for any leisurely meals, especially during your first 48-72 hours on the lam. Granola bars are small, lightweight, and guarantee you sustenance even if you have to hide in the hayloft for a day or two.