Negotiations with the Prince of Darkness took a strange and possibly fatal turn this week, as Satan and his dark angels rejected the plan you had spent the past month hammering out to get him his due. Now instead they want your boyfriend Chet in a straight-up trade.
‘Wh- what do you want with Chet?’ you asked Lucifer, but the prince of the underworld (pictured above) would not disclose his plans for your romantic partner. He merely sat on his throne and smiled.
Whatever are you going to do, give Chet up to save your own skin? Ask him if he wants to, you know, become Satan’s slave? How did you ever get into a situation where you had to negotiate with Satan, anyway?
The Gorko will continue to post updates as this damn thing unfolds.