STRANGE BUT TRUE: THIS ROCKET SCIENTIST HAS NEVER EVEN SEEN ‘APOLLO 13’

His name is John Anderson, he is a rocket scientist working for Luftwaft Labs outside of modern-day Peoria, and he lives a normal middle-class suburban life as a husband and father of two. Yet beneath his calm exterior he hides an awful secret. Read the exclusive Gorko interview with this mysterious customer below.

TGG: Oh so you are a rocket scientist.

JA: An aerospace engineer, yes. I mostly work on propulsion.

TGG: Have you ever seen Apollo 13?

JA: What, in The Smithsonian?

TGG: No fool, the 1995 dramatized version of the doomed Apollo 13 space mission.

JA: I’m afraid not. Here, I can take that. [Grabbing pizza box.]

TGG: What is wrong with you?

JA: I uh. How much is the pizza?

TGG: You call yourself a rocket scientist and yet you have never seen Apollo 13 starring Tom Hanks, Kevin Bacon, Bill Paxton AND GARY SINISE FOR EFFS SAKE.

JA: Here just take the money. Bye.

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