The Gorko Gazette

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9.23.2025 6:29 AM

Gorko Serial Offender: James Callan

THE CRIME

James writes: ‘Cave Folk’ came to me suddenly and violently, like a mighty thump by a stout, tar-dipped stone-headed axe. I think of myself as a great ape (we are all, in fact, great apes), and while I may be hairier than many of the rest of us, my back and buttocks remain bare, for which I am grateful! ‘Cave Folk’ came to me unbidden, an invasion of shards of ancient memory, vestigial fragments of my near-animal ancestral brethren. That is why I wrote it, my little modern petroglyph etched in Microsoft Word.

Read ‘Cave Folk’ (this is one hell of a ride) here.

James’ other favorite Gorko: This one sticks out in my mind, which made me laugh… ’50 (probable) celebrity rumors’ by Sarp Sozdinler.

THE CRIMINAL

James Callan is a writer from Aotearoa (New Zealand). His fiction has appeared in Apocalypse Confidential, BULL, X-R-A-Y, Reckon Review, Mystery Tribune, and elsewhere. His debut collection, Those Who Remain Quiet, is forthcoming with Anxiety Press.

BLOODY MURDER

What is Gorko Serial Offenders? We invited more than thirty writers and artists who over the years and centuries have had their work featured in The Gorko at least a few times (a few times is 3) to submit a micro exposé on their own favorite piece. What is it, where did it come from, why did it appear in The Gorko, who cares? Here is a big thank you to all our contributors. The next Gorko Serial Offenders will likely be in 2026, when you too could receive an encrypted email from Raddy that begins, Dear Humanoid, We are delighted to inform you. If you were overlooked for this callout please bring it to the attention of Scrapes Henderson, the Gorko scapegoat, by writing to thegorkogazette@gmail.com with the words CHAW ME SCRAPES in the subject line, and we will review your case.