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Sam the Black Mage

I moved back with my parents last summer after losing my job. I started hanging out with my cousin a lot, mostly because all the old guys I used to hang out with in the neighborhood left or were busy with work and marriage and all that stuff and my cousin was the only one who lived close by. But man was he a deadbeat. I didn’t tell him that he was, but what else can you say about a guy who mainly just sold weed, lifted weights, and banged sixteen-year-olds even though he was pushing thirty?

His older brother, Sam, was thirty-two. He never showered or shaved and he just stayed in his parents’ basement all the time playing MMOs. He had three chins and glasses on his nose that were poorly taped together and he was balding and he lisped. Normally, I would’ve never gone down to that basement, but I couldn’t listen to another word of my cousin telling me about some high school girl that he was trying to bang.——

‘What’s up, Sam?’

‘Playing Final Fantasy.’

‘That’s cool. I see you leveled up your black mage.’

‘I’m like the black mage. I live in the darkness.’

‘You ever leave the basement?’

‘No.’

‘Might do you some good.’

‘Society does not appreciate my kind.’

I stood there for a while while watching him play his game.

‘You ever had a girlfriend, Sam?’

‘No.’

‘Maybe it’s for the best. My last girlfriend makes me wish I never had a girlfriend sometimes.’

‘Was she a white mage?’

‘Huh?’

‘Did she heal you with her powers?’

‘She did, before she broke my heart.’

‘Sometimes you don’t know if you’re getting a white mage or Medusa.’

‘I guess.’

‘One day I’ll make the next Final Fantasy.’

‘Sure.’

‘I can program in twelve languages.’

‘Why are you living with your parents then?’

‘I sent my game to Nintendo, but they never responded.’

‘I see.’

‘I’m scared that I’m going to die before the world recognizes my genius.’

He started to cry. My cousin came downstairs.

‘Yo, what are you two gaylords doing? Sam, you crying again? Shit, dawg, you a pussy.’

ABOUT THE ARTIST

Dmitriy Kogan is a short story writer and poet from Staten Island, New York. His work has appeared or is forthcoming in Straylight Magazine, BULL, Hobart, Farewell Transmission, Some Words, and Close to the Bone.