WOMAN HAS BEEN TRAVELING FOR TWO YEARS — IN HER OWN HOME!

Over the past two years, Sandra Benucchio of North Peoria has visited every country in the world except Slovakia (or was it Slovenia), she told Gorko reporters as they worked a weekend shift at the local Wok This Way Chinese takeout.

‘Yep, that’s the stuff,’ she remarked from her front door, sniffing at the pile of cartons. ‘I know all about this spicy diced ji. I’ve been in Szechuan for the last three weeks.’

Ms. Benucchio works hard at her traveling, often spending fourteen hours a day with her nose buried in her smartphone, and is not afraid to get her hands dirty along the way or plunge off the beaten path ‘onto some unknown Mongolian Twitter feed.’

‘It really is satisfying,’ she sighed. ‘You meet a lot of people when you let go of your fears and open up a little on the internet.’

When asked when she was going to find time to trek into Slovakia (or Slovenia), our intrepid explorer just shrugged.

‘I could go there tomorrow if I wanted,’ she laughed.

One time in 1998 The Gorko visited their relatives in California on the telephone. How far technology has brought us.

IN CASE YOU ARE INTERESTED:

Excerpt from THIS IS WHAT LITERARY CRITIC AND ASSHOLE DON MARKENBALDI IS WEARING TODAY:

The Gorko will continue to provide updates on Markenbaldi’s truly garish fashion choices until he drops dead.

Photo by Charles Deluvio on Unsplash