No one should have to read, that is be subjected to an entire article from the archive bowels of the old humor print zine, brainchild of a child. And yet, ON QUOTING DICK.

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MISTER BANANA FACES A DIFFICULT DECISION REGARDING GOOD BOY
Doctor says he can’t on good conscience euthanize my dog.
END OF SUMMER FUN! PEOPLE HAVING TROUBLE WITH SANDWICHES AND OTHER MAD CAPTIONS
Here are our favorite captions for a selection of the participating images.
MISTER BANANA GOT DISTRACTED AND LOST TO A TEAM FROM ATLANTA
If there is one thing I hate in this world, it is Falcons!
MISTER BANANA THROWS A PERFECT SPIRAL
If there is one thing I hate in this world, it is Bears!
MISTER BANANA VERSUS THE NEIGHBORS
My neighbors are the biggest assholes you have ever met.
MISTER BANANA LOOOOOVES AMERICAN FOOTBALL!!!
Football season is finally here!