ANXIETY MILKSHAKE
for Ken Tomaro
1½ cups ice cream
½ cup milk
2 overdue bills
1 layoff notice
1 voicemail threatening divorce
1 note from creepy neighbor slipped under the door
3 days of no sleep
1 pot of coffee
1 bottle of Kahlua
- Pour yourself a cup of coffee. Add Kalua to taste. Maybe more Kalua.
- Add ice cream and milk to the blender.
- Add a cup of coffee to the blender.
- Add a generous portion of Kalua to the blender.
- Blend thoroughly. Pretend you are blending your husband.
- Pour yourself a cup of Kalua. Add coffee to taste.
- Shred the layoff notice, the overdue bills, and the creepy neighbor note. Toss shredding into the fireplace. Start a fire. Who cares if it’s summer?
- Leave voicemail for your husband that you’re leaving him the house. And the kids.
- Pour yourself a cup of Kalua. Forget the coffee.
- Pack your clothes.
- Open a new bank account. Transfer all funds from the old account to the new. Your husband would only spend all the money on his new girlfriend.
- Pour the contents of the blender into a vase and drink, drink, drink.
- Leave voicemail for your parents that you’re moving back home.
- Get in the car and drive away, fast.
‘Anxiety Milkshake’ first published in Kiss My Poetry.
Foto de Nathan Dumlao en Unsplash
ABOUT THE POET
Nolcha’s poems have been published in Lothlorien Poetry Journal, Alien Buddha Zine, Medusa’s Kitchen, and others. Her three chapbooks are available on Amazon. Nominee for 2023 Best of The Net. Editor for Kiss My Poetry and for Open Arts Forum. Accidental interviewer.
Website: https://bit.ly/3bT9tYu
“My Father’s Ghost Hates Cats” https://amzn.to/3uEKAqa
“The Big Unda” https://amzn.to/3IxmJhY
“How to Get Me Up in the Morning” https://www.amazon.com/How-Get-Morning-Collaboration-Photography/dp/B0BF31V4T3/
Twitter: @NolchaF
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/nolcha.fox/