BROTHER ETHERNAN? WHY NO I HAVEN’T SEEN HIM HAS HE GONE MISSING OR SOMETHING

Well well Prior Spock Brockum, good abend, what is that, you say that Brother Ethernan was nowhere to be found for Matins what a shame I hope nothing has happened to that little mama’s boy pillow humper. Why no the last time I saw the good Brother was after Confection, he had his tongue firmly lodged in your ass crack as I recall.

NO I DID NOT ARRANGE TO MEET HIM OUT IN THE SWAMPS OF UNKNOWING

No you know me Prior Spock Brockum, I prefer to do my fasting and praying indoors and do not even know my way about the Swamps of Unknowing, that would be a different monk you are thinking of, one with boots and gaiters.

HE MAY HAVE SIMPLY GONE HOME TO SEE MOMMY

My guess is that Brother Ethernan simply could not take the monastic life any longer and ran home to mommy. She does overprotect him as we all know and spoils him with gingerbread cookies.

WHY YES THIS *IS* BROTHER ETHERNAN’S BLOODY SASH HE MUST HAVE LEFT IT UNDER MY STRAW TICK AS A JOKE, HE IS NOT TERRIBLY CLEVER, PROBABLY HIS IDEA OF A HILARIOUS PRANK

That silly Brother Ethernan, always the prankster! It was his time of the month too, I see.

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