MY NEW HELLS ANGELS BUDDIES DONT USE APOSTROPHES EITHER

WERE JUST A RAGTAG GROUP OF OUTLAW LIBRARIANS

Thats right in fact me and my new librarian friends from the other side of the tracks, Hells Angels Bookmobile Club, use no apostrophes at all because thats just society keeping you down man.

Yeah so theres an apostrophe missing from our official title, we arent stupid ya know, were all been to college just like you. What if were to tell you that its YOU thats missing the apostrophe, not us, ha ha ha ha ha ha.

OUR MEMBERSHIP IS EXCLUSIVE YOU MUST BE A LIBRARY-CARD-CARRYING AMERICAN

Oh this question again, well yes sir, to be considered for membership at the Peoria chapter you need to have a valid library card, an American-made motorcycle of 750cc or larger also equipped with a bookmobile sidecar of no fewer than 500 volumes, and be fluent in Dewey.

Absolutely no narcs or casual readers, or apostrophes. The induction process is long and though many apply few are tough enough to make it through the grueling novice mobiler stage, in which the naive hopeful do the grunt work of cataloguing and shelving, often working without pay, sleeping in the stacks, doing night runs for interlibrewery exchange, and of course buffing the chrome of the Top Mobilers. This may go on for years before a novices ever considered as a prospect mobiler, and thats just to become a prospect. You see, we got to check your credentials and you got to backem up, then prove your loyalty.

YOU ARE LITERALLY MAKING THIS ALL UP, THERE ARE NO OUTLAW BOOKMOBILE GANGS

Were coming for you, sonny. Youre next on our list, you see. Better return your books on time, no slip-ups, cuz you slip up once were gonna hit you with a hells of fines.


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