The Gorko Gazette

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thegorkogazette

1.2.2025 6:29 AM

GORKO IS GAME FOR JANUARY!!!

NEW GORKO GAMES FOR YOUR 2025 BASHES

Make the first festivities of 2025 memorable occasions with three new Gorko Parlor Games that are guaranteed to stun and confuse the neighborhood!

Reverend ALEX’s Game

This game is based on the youth pastor Reverend Crawley’s Twister game and has been brutally crash-tested in Pastor Alex’s own church basement with different groups of legal teenagers. To play, the entire youth group crowds together in a circle and each person take the hands of a person on the opposite side of the circle. They then attempt to free themselves from the tangle of arms without releasing their hold on their partner. Of course no clothes are worn and the temperature of the game space should be quite high in order to generate a lot of dripping sweat and general muck.

Army Guys Go Shopping

Materials:
Battle Dress Uniforms
Objects to ‘purchase’
Army Guys Currency

Divide the guests into two groups, Army Guys and Civilian Retailers. The Civilian Retailers should ‘set up shop’ at strategic locations around the parlor, and ‘set out their wares’. Only one of the Civilian Retailers has the Golden Hen, however, which is disguised as something else (candy or pirated CDs, for example). The holder of the Golden Hen must be determined by dice roll secretly before the game begins. Meanwhile Army Guy Currency should be distributed to the Army Guys, only 25 AG units per ‘soldier’. The Army Guys proceed to ‘go shopping’ at each of the Civilian Retailer stations, and must purchase (or forcibly acquire) at least 1 item from each Civilian. A winner is declared when A) an Army Guy purchases the Golden Hen, or B) all the AG money is spent, at which case the Civilian Retailers may declare victory.

I Have A Better Idea (a One-Upmanship Game™)

Materials:
• Better Idea Cards (BICs)
• A good imagination!

Players: 2+ and three judges. Judges are chosen according to length.

The Play: Player 1 chooses a category and player 2 chooses a card. Player 1 makes a Bragging Statement and Player 2 has 10 seconds to one-up him.

BIC categories: Build Something, Eat Something, Cut Something Off, Throw Something, Drive Over Something, Kill An Animal, Have An Experience At a Dam, Plow Through It, Lift Something Heavy Off A Pedestrian, Start A Fire, Save A Kitten From A Tree, Flush Something Down the Toilet, Ride A Mule, Break A Bone.

Image generated on Magic Studio