One of the great benefits of being a famous movie reviewer is that you don’t have to go to the movies! The movies come to you. Let’s see what this week’s mailbag has brought little Todd, because Todd is ALWAYS hangry for movies!
I’M YOUR WO-MAN
SPOILER ALERT At a loss for how to spend her weekend, a not bad-looking Maren Eggert agrees to spend it with a man who looks, acts, and IS a cyborg.
4 out of 5 puppies. Arf.
SPOILER ALERT A perfect name for the perfect jerkwater, Apache Jerktown is a Western.
3 out of 5 puppies.
SPOILER ALERT This movie is about a superhero who, much in the vein of Birdman, walks the line like Johnny Cash. Todd thought it disappointing that the actual character Venom is only on-screen for 13 minutes of the three and a half hour runtime. To be fair, those are some VERY venomous minutes.
5 out of 5 puppies. Arf arf!
SPOILER ALERT Though some people prefer to spell the title of this movie Titane, we do not. A lazy disaster of a disaster flick, the special effects are so bad that apparently the director decided to take the disaster right out of this movie, and in the process ruined Todd’s afternoon.
2 out of 5 puppies. Bow wow.