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by thegorkogazette

3 REASONS TO COME OVER TO MY HOUSE AND MAKE TURKISH FOOD FOR ME WHILE I SIT ON THE COUCH

So it has happened again: you are doubting whether you should come over to my house and cook Turkish food for me while I sit on the couch and do nothing. Well here are three reasons why you should maybe reconsider your selfish, thoughtless position.

I HAVE FALLEN AND I CANNOT GET UP

Has it occurred to you that perhaps I have fallen onto this couch, through no design of my own, and am unable to get off it? Maybe that is exactly what happened.

YOUR MEAT DURUM WOULD BRING TEARS TO THE EYES OF PHILIP MARLOWE

Show mercy, sweet friend, even the most hardboiled detective would weep to taste your savory meat durum.

YOU HAVE TO, YOU DON’T HAVE ANY SHARP KNIVES AT YOUR HOUSE

None of your knives are sharp enough to make Turkish food, anyway. You NEED me to sit on my couch and watch while you make Turkish food.

Photo by ThePowerCouple on Unsplash

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