‘It was a hard day for Toby at the beach,’ admitted his sister Charlie as the family trudged back to their rented cabin, Toby of course stomping on ahead. He had gotten sunscreen in his mouth and mayonnaise in his eye, and was in no mood to talk about it, so we mainly interrogated the other family members.
TGG: How did Toby get the sunscreen in his mouth?
CHAS: He went to grab for his sandwich, which he always does, you know really impatient when it comes to finger food, and he still had sunscreen all over his hands, like gobs and gobs of sunscreen.
TGG: So that sunscreen went right into his mouth with the sandwich.
CHAS: That is exactly what happened, except he thought it was mayonnaise, so he was licking his fingers and then he realized what had happened.
TGG: Did Toby say what the sunscreen tasted like?
CHAS: No, he just started spitting. Then he tripped and fell over a table and knocked over some people’s drinks. We had to move down the beach a ways.
TGG: I see. Is that when he got the mayonnaise in his eye?
CHAS: In his eyes. Both eyes, yes.
TGG: Normally people get sunscreen in their eyes, not mayonnaise.
CHAS: Again a case of mistaken identity. Toby was so mad about eating the sunscreen that he went for what he thought was the squeeze tube of sunscreen, which was actually the squeeze tube of mayonnaise, and, well.
TGG: He rubbed the mayonnaise all over his chest and face.
CHAS: Exactly, exactly. And it went into his eyes, instead of getting rubbed into the skin, it just got him all greasy.
TGG: What did Toby do then?
CHAS: He knocked over some toddlers and grabbed their beach towel so we had to, actually yeah we had to call it a day early.
TGG: Why didn’t you just let Toby take a small siesta back at the house?
CHAS: Oh no no, we have to watch out for him.
TGG: Well thank you for your time, this really has cleared up a lot of questions.
CHAS: Thanks.
¡¡¡ACHTUNG!!! ¡¡¡GORKO RETREAD!!!
‘MAN GETS SUNSCREEN IN MOUTH, MAYONNAISE IN EYE’ ORIGINALLY PUBLISHED ON 25 MAY 2021 AT 6:00 AM. BECAUSE EVERYTHING WE PUBLISHED THAT MONTH WAS HILARIOUS.
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Photo by BATCH by Wisconsin Hemp Scientific on Unsplash

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