Month: November 2022
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FROM THE BIGFOOT SPECIAL: ‘ETHICS AS A CONSEQUENCE’ BY COLIN JAMES
On his third visit the Doc cut those shoes off. / Said that was the best he could do.
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SIGN UP FOR THE GORKO WEEKLY PREVIEW! EVERY MONDAY GET A TASTE OF THE SWEET AND GREASY GORKO BANQUET TO COME
The Gorko Weekly Preview is the weekly newsletter distributed to hardcore Gorko fans via email every Monday.
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GORKO UNFUN BUT TRUE LESSON OF THE DAY: YOU BROKE YOUR MOM’S FIDDLE
Some lessons are harder than others, and although today’s lesson is pretty unfun, it just might save your mom’s fiddle. Photo by Kajetan Sumila on Unsplash you may also like…
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ARE YOU THE SEX GRINCH? A HOLIDAY GUIDE
Would you feast on Who-pudding, and rare Who-roast-beast, or is that something that you (the sex grinch) cannot stand in the least?
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Upcoming Movie: ‘The Loin King’
A hundred years of peace has ended with the arrival of a rival claimaint to Mufaza the Twelfth’s Loin Throne, Uncle One-Eyed Jack.
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FAMILY HOLIDAY STRESS INCREASES AS UNCLE TOBY’S THANKSGIVING DATE DESCRIBES OTHER SUGAR DADDY
Why did you bring a date to our family dinner, hissed Mom immediately after grace, refusing to pass ‘Asia’ the potatoes.
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BIGFOOT CLAIMS HER KIND AREN’T TALL TALES DESPITE PUBLIC OPINION BY J.B. DAVIS
No word yet on whether or not public opinion will be swayed on the reality of Bigfoot, or if Sassy and Barry will tie the knot.
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IF YOU WERE A PILGRIM AND COULD DO ANYTHING YOU WANTED WITH THIS PUMPKIN, WHAT WOULD IT BE
If you were a pilgrim about to celebrate your first harvest in the New World and were presented by this fine orange pumpkin by the Pokanoket warrier Squanto, what would you do with it? STICK IT DIRECTLY BACK INTO MOTHER…
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WHAT THE WAY YOUR CAT EATS YOUR CHEERIOS CAN TELL YOU ABOUT WHETHER YOU SHOULD JUST GO BACK TO BED AND STAY THERE
Go to bed, pull the covers over your head, and stay there. Do not leave your bed today.
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GORKO UNFUN BUT TRUE LESSON OF THE DAY: NOT YOUR GIRLFRIEND TOBY
Some lessons are harder than others, and although today’s lesson is tolerably unfun, it just might save your life. Photo by National Cancer Institute on Unsplash you may also like…
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‘3 POEMS NEVER ACCEPTED BY ADROIT’ BY JOSEPH LEE MEADS
Those rococo narcocorridos or that blatnyak beat of hammers or chisels – it all equates to a natural invasiveness such as the iris’ venomous leaks.
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WHY NOT JUST POUND OUT THAT RUSSIAN NOVEL? 3 PEOPLE IN YOUR OFFICE WHO ALREADY HAVE
Not only can you probably write a better novel than Jerry, you pretty much have to.
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FROM THE BIGFOOT SPECIAL: EXCERPT FROM ‘THE GHOST’S LEAVETAKING’ BY JACOB AUSTIN
Oh communitas and your swinger energy!
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Poet’s Corner: ‘Premium Steel Plow’ by Allen Bours
Commentary by Tark Mackintosh folded arms The poet immediately sets the stage: Young Men’s Library Association members in tweed with crossed arms (never akimbo) prowl the streets of San Joaquin after imbibing deliciousness in the form of fruity beverages prepared…
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GORKO UNFUN BUT TRUE LESSON OF THE DAY: THIS BAG DOES NOT HAVE WHEELS
Some lessons are harder than others, but although today’s lesson is pretty unfun, it just might end up saving your life. Photo by Harsh Jadav on Unsplash you may also like…
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IS THE UK GETTING CLOSER?
Looking at recent satellite images, it looks like the sucker is now suddenly right in the middle of the Atlantic Ocean.
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WHEN COUSINS AREN’T FRIENDS: HOW TO BREAK IT TO 35-YEAR-OLD CORY, YOUR AUNT’S BOY
Tell Cory that you are no longer 10-year-old boys, but are in fact grown-ups with completely separate lives and nothing in common.
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BEEFCAKE FACTORY: APRIL 2020 COVID MESSAGE FOR PATRONS BY BOB GIELOW
Please note that ‘VAP – Virile Access Pass’ members will continue to be allowed on set during our photo/video shoots.
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GORKO UNFUN BUT TRUE LESSON OF THE DAY: NOT WINNING THE DERBY THIS YEAR
Some lessons are harder than others, but today’s lesson is just plain unfun. Take a second to think over today’s line of wisdom. Photo by Jacob Morch on Unsplash you may also like…
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GLENFIDDUCK 12 YEAR SCOTCH (5 OUT OF 5 STARS): MOBILITY SCOOTER FLIES THROUGH BARRICADE, PLUMMETS ONTO NUDE BEACH
5 out of 5 stars for bursting through things in a mobility scooter.
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3 PEOPLE IN LINE AT DISNEY LAND WHO IF THEY HEAR YOU SAY ‘A THING’ ONE MORE TIME WILL BEND YOU OVER AND SCALP YOU
Joe has already heard you say ‘a thing’ and ‘do a thing’ fourteen times while standing in line for the Whirl-A-Gag Delux. He is loosening his boot knife as we speak.
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The Lemondrop Dream Blog: When Men Kiss Trophies
Hello friends. My name is Lemon Reilly, your Life Doctor.
