Petals pucker,
stems slump,
crab apples rot
Month: August 2022
Classic Gorko: Answers to FAQs About Celebrities in Harness
What’s the difference between a rock star celebrity and a normal celebrity?
YOU KNOW HOW TO SAY ‘BBQ PIT SLAG MITTEN’ IN CHUUKIC DON’T YOU IT’S ‘BONO’
Pass me the slutty Bono, Charles, we need to turn this grease hog over.
MODERN-DAY JESUS CHRIST? THIS MAN WAS CRUCIFIED ON SOCIAL MEDIA AND 3 DAYS LATER WENT WATERSKIING ON LAKE TAHOE
By midnight on the same day, Twitter influencers had declared Gary for all intents and purposes a dead man.
Pages of poems by Jason Visconti
page 1 There Is A Demon Inside Us Its rage is large with luster like an untamed moonbeam,And these moonbeams dance together in a wicked dance,It turns all lunar love into another thing,Eclipse this moon […]
‘Paper cunts’ by Captain B
On a Montana patio
With my Uncle Jim
And a cellar full of wine
LET’S MAKE FUN IN CAR: RADDY’S TOP 10 LONG HOT SUMMER SPAM EMAILS OF 2022
Gorko EIC obviously receives a lot of mail from real and sexy people, but what you may not have known about are the vast piles of sexy SPAM mail he is also forced to sift […]
3 RAUNCHY SALAD DRESSINGS THAT WILL LITERALLY KILL CHILDREN
NO TOMMY NOT THE strawberry chipotle HAIL CAESAR! SCREAMED BABY JANE, BUT TOO LATE It is what you always suspected growing up in the Midwest: more than 65% of all raunchy salad dressings you were […]
ROOMMATE NORMAN SCHLEPTFELDER, AN UNEMPLOYED DISHWASHER, KEEPS SAYING ‘THE NEW NORM’ EVERY TIME HE GETS A HAIRCUT
What is definitely not part of the new Norm is any new resolution to do his own dishes, offer to cook for the house, pick up his junk, or do any cleaning whatsoever.
GORKO UNFUN BUT TRUE LESSON OF THE DAY
Some lessons are harder than others. Some lessons are just plain unfun. We are not preaching. No one is forcing you to live a better, more productive life. All we ask is that you think […]
The Lemondrop Dream Blog: When jazz argot go way mean way over hep cat head teapad puffers like hum dum baby
Hello friends. My name is Lemon Reilly, your Life Doctor.