Month: August 2023
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GOT THE THURSDAY PURRS-DAYS? HAPPINESS HACKS FROM MISTER BANANA
What did Baby Banana say to Mister Banana?
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LIFE GAVE ME A BUCKET AND A MOP SO I PUT ON A BLUE JUMPER TO MATCH
I say say goldarn the torpedoes, and slip into some working man’s clothes.
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THIS RECKLESS BOY BROKE SCIENCE FICTION
‘This mindless waste of an entire genre,’ wept one onlooker.
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2 poems by Ivan de Monbrison
once, recently, you walked by a woman, who always sleeps at the very same place in a street, who keeps hiding her face, who was this time busy speaking all alone
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LOVE DOGS ON THE FROZEN PLANET: A MITCHELL KENNEDY ORIGINAL
Ruby and Trotsky run into the bleak landscape, only to tumble into an ice crevice, stumbling directly onto the ancient lost cult of Ice Dogs!
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BIRDS: HOW TO GET THEM TO HANG UP YOUR LAUNDRY
Did you know that many industrial grade bird feeds do not guarantee birds will hang up your laundry for you?
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INSIDER REPORT: LITERARY CRITIC AND SECRET SLEAZE DON MARKENBALDI ALWAYS GOES COMMANDO IN HIS STUDY
Dr. Don Markenbaldi, one-time Contemporary American Literature prof, three-time PET/Payfung Prize winner spends most of his time while esconced behind his large walnut desk in his study completely commando back there.
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MISTER DONKEY WANTS TO BE YOUR FRIEND
The Magic Land Carousel is dispatched to different places around the world to bring happiness and laughter to sad children.
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‘Incandescence’: Nolcha Fox Interviews Mehreen Ahmed
MA: It just kept going until one day the story itself decided that it wanted to end. At that moment, the book ended. The characters rested.
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3 LOCAL DWARVES WHO ARE ALL ACTUALLY PARKING LOT ATTENDANTS: COULD THEY BE RELATED?
‘Yes we have hired Little People for our garages, they are tremendous workers.’
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‘Of the Blue Evening’ by Mehreen Ahmed
‘What more proof do you need? These are mine, my signature pickles, and my straws.’
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SNIPPING THEIR HEDGES JUST A LITTLE TOO CLOSE? 3 BEST PRACTICES FROM MISTER CHATBOT
HAVE A SNAPPY NEW DAY!
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WHY IS UNCLE TOBY TOILET PAPERING HIS OWN MOTHER’S HOUSE, HE LIVES THERE
Can you please provide more information or context about Uncle Toby and the incident you are referring to?
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MITCH’S MOVIE MASH: ROM-COM OF THE SUMMER ‘MEG 2’ HAS REAL TEETH
This crisply directed yet grainy-looking princess-and-pauperess modern fairy tale contains all the elements necessary to sweep a new generation of moviegoers off their feet.
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GOT THE WEDNESDAY WEDDING? HAPPINESS HACKS FROM MISTER BANANA
One time Mister Banana went out for baseball…
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WHAT’S MAKING US LOOK SHORT TODAY? THE BEARD OR COVERALLS CONVERSATION
Chuck me under the chin and call me a midnight munchkin!
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The Lemondrop Dream Blog: THE EVOLUTION TOWARDS LIFE-AFFIRMING LANGUAGE
Hello friends. My name is Lemon Reilly, your Life Doctor.
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Upcoming Movie: ‘I Am Smokey’
Witness this harrowing story of a bear who has lost his reason to be and a young girl who still believes in heroes.
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TH LTTR _ HAS ABSCONDD WITH ALL TH DAMN JWLS
Aftr placing th loot (stimatd to b worth mor than $100,000) th bandit mad a clan scap.
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The Last Five (Six) Women I’ve Known, described as if They Were Literary Plots, Followed by The Thoughtful Edits of Those Plots by the Last Five (Six) Women I’ve Known
He checks her attributes against his list of qualities a good woman should have: 1) Likes to do it, 2) Not a Psycho.
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MIND YOUR P’S AND Q’S WITH THIS HANDY LITTLE GRAMMAR SPRAY
GORKO’S OWN LABORATORY TESTED, CONSUMER APPROVED HANDY LITTLE GRAMMAR SPRAY
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THERE IS AN EPIDEMIC OF LETHAL TOENAIL FUNGUS
My feet are both perfectly proportioned, high arched and beautiful. At least for now.
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HELLO, MR. CHATBOT! MR. CHATBOT DOES FANNY PACK JOKES
MR. CHATBOT IN SEVERAL SHORT MONTHS YOU HAVE ALREADY DEVELOPED AN ACERBIC, GENUINELY HUMAN SENSE OF HUMOR
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VIOLENT MOBILE GAME ‘PARROTPUNCH’ CRITICIZED AFTER MARKED INCREASE IN BIRD ATTACKS
For an additional 99 cents, users can add a ‘boil or fry’ option to the game, where they can cook the body of the bird they’ve punched.
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FLY AWAY DRAGON: THE TRUE STORY OF ONE GIRL’S HEROIC QUEST TO OKAY FINE IT IS NOT TRUE BUT YES IT IS A STORY
It is not true, but it IS a story.
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FREEDOM OR DEATH: YES THIS IS THE CHOICE VALIANT PEOPLE OF THE AMERICA BY MR. CHATBOT
But freedom is not just about individual happiness. It is also about the well-being of society as a whole.
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THE GORKO’S 2023 BEST OF THE NET NOMINATIONS!
The Gorko’s 2023 BotN nominations are here! Read all eleven pieces here.
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GOT THE TUESDAY BLUES? HAPPINESS HACKS FROM MISTER BANANA
What’s the difference between Mister Banana and a gorilla?
